Sports Jokes

2091401

2091401

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Post any jokes you hear about sports here. Remember, these are just jokes. Don't take any too personally.

I'll start.

What do you get when you have a Steelers fan buried up to his neck in sand? MORE SAND! :P
 
How many polite Yankees fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Both of them. :P
 
If you ever throw something towards someone, and it just lands at their feet. You just have to say "I was just Tebowing it"
 
To give you an idea of the kind of season the Bengals are having, the person who handled their side of the scoreboard was sick for three weeks and nobody noticed.
 
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Dec 5, 2011 18:00:58 GMT -5 Moss63 said:To give you an idea of the kind of season the Bengals are having, the person who handled their side of the scoreboard was sick for three weeks and nobody noticed.
You could have at least done a team that actually fit into that description. :P
 
Q: What is the difference between Yankee fans and dentists?
A: One roots for the yanks, and the other yanks for the roots.
 
So Peyton Manning (no reason I'm choosing him, just the first QB that popped into my head) dies and goes to heaven. The first thing he sees is a giant mansion, covered in Colts memorabilia, built specifically for him. Then, he looks across the street and sees an even bigger mansion, crafted to the utmost perfection, and covered in Bengals memorabilia. Peyton asks God why Andy Dalton got a bigger mansion than him. God says, "That's not Andy Dalton's, that's Mine." :P
 
A Bears fan, a Redskins fan, a Bills fan, and a Cowboys fan are climbing up a mountain. They're arguing about how passionate they are for their team.
So when they reach the top, the Bears fan says,"I'm so passionate I'll take my own life for them." Then the Bears fan jumps off the mountain, killing himself.
Then the Bills fan says,"This is for the Bills!" and takes his own life by jumping off the mountain.
Then the Redskins fan says,"This is for everybody!"
He pushes the Cowboys fan off the mountain. ;D
 
A guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender said, "Sorry. No pets allowed."

The man replied, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Raiders game and you'll see." The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game.

The guy said, "Watch. Whenever the Raiders score, my dog does flips." The Raiders keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.

"Wow! That's one heck of a dog you got there. What happens when the Raiders score a touchdown?"

The man replied, "I don't know. I've only had him for seven years!"
 
1.
Q: How many years has Charlie Batch been in the NFL?
A: Well lets see, I remember when he was a Quarterback for the Lions which was...
1 year ago um..no
7 years ago um..not quite
16 years ago um.. nowhere near
35 years ago um.. getting closer, but not too far

2.
What is Ben Rothlisberger's most frequently spoken phrase?
"I can't feel my surgically repaired face"
 
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Dec 5, 2011 18:48:01 GMT -5 2091401 said:So Peyton Manning (no reason I'm choosing him, just the first QB that popped into my head) dies and goes to heaven. The first thing he sees is a giant mansion, covered in Colts memorabilia, built specifically for him. Then, he looks across the street and sees an even bigger mansion, crafted to the utmost perfection, and covered in Bengals memorabilia. Peyton asks God why Andy Dalton got a bigger mansion than him. God says, "That's not Andy Dalton's, that's Mine." :P I think you should edit this for the other QB besides Peyton Manning to be Tim Tebow and the other team the Broncos.
 
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